Sunday, May 12, 2013

Our First Mother's Day!

Hello Evie!

Today was a very special day...we celebrated Mother's Day! It's my very first one! I want to say that it was the perfect day, but everything that frustrated me today will soon become something that we laugh at. Like the time mommy dropped her iPhone in the toilet and we were't able to go see Iron Man 3. Or that the lady in the nursery at Aunt Melissa and Uncle Ryan's church gave you the wrong bottle. Or the huge fight that me and Nan got into. For awhile there, I was pretty sure that nothing would turn the day around. But after some crying and pouting, your awesome dad came in and saved the day.

For my first Mother's Day, I didn't get any fancy jewelry or bath fizzies or breakfast in bed or whatever it is that mom's usually get. On Friday night your dad came in from work and gave me the sweetest gift! In 2011 we went to Madrid, and on our last full day we spent the afternoon in Retiro Park and had a big Spanish picnic. So for my gift, he got me everything to recreate that picnic! So he suggested that this afternoon, we pack up all that good stuff, spread out a blanket, and have picnic together!

Thank you for such a wonderful Mother's Day, and thank you for making me a mommy. I love you Evie!

xox-mommy








Friday, May 10, 2013

Your Birth Story, Part 1

Hello Evie!

You will be 10 weeks tomorrow. I really can't believe it. I feels like we were just bringing you home from the hospital, and now you are growing up so big and strong. So before you grow another inch or hit another milestone, I've got to get this all down! 

First let me start by saying that my pregnancy with you was REALLY hard. I started getting sick before I even knew I was pregnant, even before a test would detect it! The day before I hit the 6 week mark was when the nausea really kicked in, and it was with me everyday until somewhere around the 22 week mark. Even after I still was sick all of the time, but I also had to deal with carpal tunnel syndrome, severe back pain, acid indigestion that made me feel like my esophagus was going to burn to a crisp, itching allover that couldn't be medicated, not to mention the HORMONES!! Oh my goodness. When I went in for my first appointment at just 4 weeks, they checked the hormone levels in my blood, my progesterone was at 27.3, and they wanted it to be at at least 10. The nurse who called me with the results said, "you are definitely pregnant...congratulations!" As they continued to check my HCG levels, they were nearly tripling every 48 hours instead of just doubling. It was such a huge sigh of relief every time I would get those results and hear how high my hormone levels were, BUT, that certainly translated to me being certifiably insane! I cried all the time. I was sad, I was angry, I was upset, and maybe even depressed. I was so excited that you were well on your way, but you sure did mess with my emotions!! 

I also had a rare thing happen in my last trimester with you, and that was something called polyhydramnios, which means that I had an excess of amniotic fluid, which you loved! You had all kinds of room to move around and kick me every second of every day (which I loved!). But it made me SO big! I was HUGE! And I was miserable. By time January rolled around, rolling was about the only way I could get around! I had to have lots of ultrasounds in the last trimester because of the poly, and the ultrasound technician AND Dr. Adcock kept telling me that you would get here early. Well, I hit 38 weeks and you weren't ready to show yet. I was having contractions, but none strong or long enough to send me into labor. When I went in for my 38 week appointment, a Wednesday, I talked to Dr. Campbell about how the itching had moved to my palms and bottom of my feet, which could indicate some kind of something that could have had me at the hospital the very next day having you! So I waited for TWO DAYS to get these blood work results back. Well finally, late Friday afternoon, they called me and said "Malinda, the good news is that your results are normal, but the bad news is that you aren't having a baby today. But the scheduler will call you in a few minutes, and we'll have you here on Monday for your c-section." Well crap. I went and drowned out my sorrows in a key lime Pinkberry covered in pineapples and blueberries. Not only was I so ready to meet you, but I was so miserable and so big that I just couldn't imagine being pregnant for another day. 

So sure enough, about 4:45 that afternoon the scheduler called me. She said, "I'm sorry Malinda, but Dr. Adcock doesn't have anything available for Monday, we can't get you in for your c-section." Just as I was about to throw my phone out the window, she said, "but I called him, and he said to ask you if you could come in tomorrow morning." Um...yes!!! So I called your dad and told him the big news! Everything at home was ready, and what wasn't could wait. That night, me and your dad went to Waffle House (for the second night in a row...I was really craving it!), and had such a great time knowing what would happen the next morning! We talked about Santa Claus, I remember. (Santa Claus is real no matter Dad says!). When we got back to the house we watched a movie called Argo, which is about the Iranian hostage crisis back in the early 1980s. It had just won the Oscar for best picture and we really wanted to watch it. It was great, but now, your birth and the Iranian hostage crisis go together in a weird way now...

       
So I popped the last two Tums for my indigestion, drank my last gulp of water, then it was midnight and I couldn't eat anymore. The biggest day in my life was about to happen!

I woke up the next morning, quite frankly, dry heaving like crazy. I was dehydrated, hungry, and nervous. We loaded everything in the car, took this last photo of me and my huge belly, and kissed Ruby and Tallula goodbye. 


The morning of March 2nd, 2013 was beautiful. It was really, really cold, but it was snowing! Driving to Brookwood Hospital with snow whisping around our car was so lovely. We listened to Marcy Playground, one of the only bands that me and your dad both like! I had to call Aunt Melissa when, despite all of my planning from the previous 9 months, I realized I didn't know what floor to go to to check in! 


Triage #5 is where I spent the next 2 1/2 hours! We had a wonderful nurse who kept me calm and couldn't have been sweeter. However, there was a terrible nurse who kept messing up the port in my arm, and she freaked me out! I ended up having a pretty serious panic attack. I couldn't breathe or sit still, I just needed to get up and walk around, but I was connected to IVs and cords and had the compression hoses on my legs, but she let me walk around to calm myself down, which didn't work at all. So while dad was trying to settle me down, she called Dr. Adcock and he ordered some verset for my IV...ah, what a wonderful moment that was! I immediately calmed down and basically collapsed on your dad. Literally the next thing I knew, they were rolling me into the OR! 

I was so high on verset that I couldn't have been calmer. Your dad was so great. Although he'll easily admit that despite all of the horror movies he's watched, the smell of my burning flesh and seeing the reflection of my stomach clamped open and my entrails pouring out of me was a little more than he could handle! 

                                     


                                     
Splayed out on the OR table

                                      
Dr. Adcock, and Dad's first time to see you! You are so beautiful Evie!

                                       

                                       
The first time we saw each other! 



Until I figure out how the heck to upload a video, click here to see the video of our first face-to-face meeting! 

I'm so glad your daddy captured this. It was one of the best moments of my entire life.  When Dr. Adcock pulled you out of my belly, Dr. Radbill (who has been delivering babies for about 40 years now) exclaimed "look at those cheeks!!" like he had never even seen anything like it! I remember laying on the operating table, with my eyes closed and high on anti-anxiety meds, and smiling so big because it was the first description I ever heard of the way you physically look. I knew I was just a minute or two away from seeing what you look like. At 10:39 am, your dad starting exclaiming "she's here! Malinda she's here! She's beautiful!" and then, the nurse put your head next to mine. There you were! My arms were stretched out so I couldn't hold you just yet, but I snuggled up to you the best I could! I laugh, and kind of feel bad that, that the first thing I ever said to you was "you're not going to fit into the clothes we brought for you!" (which of course you did). The polyhydramnios made you so swollen, you poor thing! You weighed 10 pounds, 10 ounces when you were born, which was a whole pound more than we expected! Of course you left the hospital barely over the 9 pound mark, once some of that fluid drained out of you! But we'll come back to that soon enough. I love that we got your first "lower lip quiver" on this video. You still do that from time to time! It's so funny! And while you were in belly, I could feel something shake and quiver around on my left side and I always wondered what it was...it was you shaking your leg, and you did that until you were about 6 weeks old whenever you'd stretch. So sweet!

They rolled us all into recovery where they laid you on my chest and I just held you as close as I could. I couldn't see your face very well, and that was all I wanted to see. They gave me a bottle to give you, but I was so tired and so weak that I just couldn't hold you very well. So your dad ended up giving you most of your first bottle. 


The nurses kept asking me how I was feeling, and maybe it was the drugs and the epidural, but I said "I'm alarmed at how great I feel." And I did, I really felt great. They wheeled us up to our room, you got a bath, and I got a popsicle! 


Nurse Candace was our first nurse, and she took care of you during part of your stay in the NICU. We loved her! 

Yaya, Papa John, Aunt Leah, Uncle Paul, and cousin Harrison were your first visitors. Harrison couldn't have been sweeter. To this day, every time he sees you, he gives you kisses and says "baaabee!" 




Me and my morphine sat up in bed and chatted with everyone, just enjoying the family time and welcoming you into the world! I started to get very, very sleepy though, and I spent the next little while in and out of sleep!  

A few hours later, after having Jackson's 1st birthday at Nan and Grandaddy's house, my side of the family came to see you. Uncle Michael was out of town, but we'll come back to that funny moment in a little bit! 

Nan, Grandaddy, Aunt Melissa, and even your great grandmother Millie and your great Aunt Debi came to see you! Nan came over to see me and hug me while everyone else was crowded around your isolette, and then Mawmaw Millie came over and told her how much I wish my Pawpaw was there to meet you! That, unfortunately, was the exact moment when things started getting bad. But before I launch into that, here's some sweet pictures of you and my side of the family meeting you for the first time! 






So yes, after these sweet moments, just as the family was finally getting there, I grabbed Candace and said, "you don't understand, something is wrong. This isn't normal." I was hemorrhaging and they couldn't get it to stop. The details are still fuzzy, and I felt so terrible all of a sudden, and I'm not exactly sure what all happened. But I know that I screamed at everyone to get out of my room. The curtain was pulled as I had 3 nurses hovering over me trying to get me to stop bleeding, but I just couldn't. Aunt Debi and my mom kept sneaking in and out of the room and I was so exposed, I just couldn't believe that people kept coming in there! I was in so much pain and everything the nurses were doing hurt me so bad. I heard later that my dad was out in hallway with everyone apologizing to them for my behavior, which infuriated me. And still does! Next time any of them are bleeding uncontrollably after bringing a new life into the world, I'm going to set up a game of checkers and a couple cups of coffee and expect nothing less than a pleasant conversation from them! Whatever, anyway. My awesome nurses finally got the bleeding under control, although I was feeling pretty bad still. Aunt Ruth came in to see us too, and she told me later that I looked so weak and sickly and that my skin was yellow from the blood loss. What a rough day! 



Here is our first family photo! I look terrible, your dad looks exhausted and excited, and you are just as happy and content as can be! 


So that was your first day, little Evie, the first day of the rest of our lives! What a day huh? It was pretty rough at times, but it was the happiest day ever. You were the most beautiful baby I had ever seen, and you were mine! Part II coming soon, but you're laying in your bassinet right now, and you're starting to stir a little bit, so it's time to get you up and cuddle with you for a little while and give you your next bottle. 

xox-mommy 



Thursday, May 9, 2013

Your Baby Dedication


Hello Evie!

This past Sunday (Cinco de Mayo!) you were dedicated at our home church, Church at Cahaba Bend. It was such a fun day with you and our family. 


You wore a sweet pink smocked gown that Kamin's mom Holly Hoyle made for you. Typically, your not one for smocked outfits, but I told Kamin that the only smocked frock you would ever wear would be something with cupcakes or skull and crossbones, and it had to be made Hand-smocked by Holly!! 



You hated it. 


Seriously. You were furious that morning. I don't think we have EVER seen this face on you!



My favorite photo from the day! When we first walked you up there, you flashed your big dimpled grin at Lyle. Everyone else loves this photo too, it's even Lyle's Facebook profile picture right now! People who don't even know you are commenting on your unrelentingly adorableness!  



You did so good the entire time you were up there. Not a peep or a cry from you! Although you did fill up your diaper in silence...but I could feel it! I looked over at your dad and said "she is ripping it, right now." Our little secret! Well, I guess not now!  






According to Methodist tradition, babies are baptized by sprinkling at birth. We think this is a beautiful public testimony of the faith with which we will raise you, but your dad and I decided that we would hold off on baptism until you are older, and we pray everyday that you will grow to love your Creator and Savior! So instead, Lyle found some beautiful Methodist liturgy that falls more in line with a dedication than a baptism. I knew this day would be so special and meaningful, but I did not know that the whole congregation would stand with you and say a prayer over you, with your name even in it! It was such a beautiful thing, I'm so glad we have it on video! 









Uncle Michael and Uncle Ryan weren't able to make it, but your whole family came to see you on this wonderful day. Even Uncle David and Aunt Ruth popped in just for a few minutes and stood in the back to see your dedication. Afterward we all had a wonderful lunch, and you did so great then too! You are the perfect baby Evalyn June! 

This day was so wonderful and such a time of worship and praise for us. Before He formed you, He knew you. We have been with you since before you were born, when you were just a tiny cluster of cells in my belly 11 months ago! It is our promise to you that will with raise you to walk with the Lord, and our prayer that you will never go a day without knowing the love He has for you or the love He has given us for you. You are so amazing, we love you so much darling. 

xox, mommy

Sunday, May 5, 2013

Hello Evie!

Hello Sweet Evalyn June!
It's Cinco de Mayo! It's 4:30 in the morning. And I am wide awake! A year ago your daddy and I went to see the Avengers and we ate churros con chocolat...yesterday you were 9 weeks old! What a difference a year makes! Last June, when we realized you were growing in my belly, a time of crazy insomnia started in my life. From the first night I knew you were there, I stayed awake all night long, praying to God that the opportunity to meet you and know you would come to fruition. Even after the 12 week mark I prayed it. I prayed it every night. When you were born, I thought that I would wake up for your night time feedings then go right back to sleep, but rarely does that happen! I still lay awake many hours during the night, thinking mostly of you (and your daddy too!). I thank God for another day with my new little family, I pray for a long and healthy life for us all so your daddy and I can watch you grow and see what you become, for peace in being a stay-at-home mom, for patience in life in general, for guidance in this new stage of my life...I pray a lot!

During these sleepless nights I also think of all of the ways I can capture your life. It feels like I was just in the hospital meeting you face-to-face for the first time, and now you're working your way to 3 months old! I have ordered lots of photos and bought lots of scrapbooking supplies so I can make a big book that documents your sweet life, but it's really hard to sit down and work on that sometimes--you keep me very busy! So during this particular sleepless night, I decided to get out of bed, sit on the couch, and start this little blog. This isn't my first blog, I don't have a fantastic track record of keeping up with them! But this is the blog I feel most inspired to write. You inspire and amaze me every single day little Evie. You have given "love" a whole new meaning. I understand life and the unconditional love Christ has for us so much better now. Your daddy and I stare at you sleeping in your crib at night and say over and over again "she is so beautiful!!" because I honestly thing that we sometimes can't even believe that YOU are OURS!!

So here goes Miss Evie. I never want to forget a second that I spend with you. You are my life. I love you more than I can even understand.

xox,
mommy